Cat meme captions, narrated by the cat.

I have made a list of your decisions and I am ready to discuss it.

JudgementalPairs with serious-cat close-up.

You bought the cheaper food. We will be addressing this in court.

JudgementalPairs with judgmental-cat side-eye.

Your posture is concerning. So is your playlist.

JudgementalPairs with stern-cat stare.

I watched you eat the leftovers. You know what you did.

JudgementalPairs with smudge-the-cat at table.

That was a five-second decision and I will be punishing it for a week.

JudgementalPairs with side-eye cat.

Knocked it off the counter for personal growth.

ChaosPairs with surprised-cat wide-eye.

On a strict 4 a.m. zoomies schedule. Non-negotiable.

ChaosPairs with motion-blur cat.

I do not know what this charger is. I am eating it now.

ChaosPairs with kitten-with-cable.

The plant was annoying me. I have resolved the situation.

ChaosPairs with cat-in-spilled-soil.

I will be screaming for unspecified reasons until further notice.

ChaosPairs with screaming-cat zoom.

I love you in the way only a small mafia boss can.

AffectionPairs with cat-on-chest cuddle.

You are my human. You are also my chair. Both feel correct.

AffectionPairs with cat-on-laptop.

I head-butted you. That was three weeks of feelings.

AffectionPairs with bonk-head cat.

I purr only at low volume because I am a private person.

AffectionPairs with sleepy-cat curled up.

I will sit on you. This is the highest honour I confer.

AffectionPairs with cat-on-laptop.

The moment the can opener moves three millimetres.

HungryPairs with surprised-cat zoom.

I am being starved. I last ate forty-five minutes ago. Notify the press.

HungryPairs with begging-cat photo.

Bowl: visible bottom. Situation: critical.

HungryPairs with empty-bowl meme.

If I scream loud enough, food appears. The system works.

HungryPairs with screaming-cat.

I do not eat at 6 p.m. like a peasant. Bring it earlier.

HungryPairs with smug-cat at bowl.

Staring at the wall: I see things you wouldn't believe.

ExistentialPairs with serious-cat staring.

I am thinking about a sound from 2017. It is not over.

ExistentialPairs with thoughtful-cat profile.

The red dot has returned. So have I.

ExistentialPairs with chasing-cat blur.

I have nine lives. This one is for napping.

ExistentialPairs with sleepy-cat curled.

Time is fake. Treats are real.

ExistentialPairs with thoughtful-cat profile.

You closed the door. I have not forgotten.

VengeancePairs with door-staring cat.

I have many feelings about your absence and most of them are loud.

VengeancePairs with screaming-cat.

Specifically your shoes. Specifically the inside.

VengeancePairs with cat-near-shoes.

You scheduled a vet visit. I read the calendar invite.

VengeancePairs with side-eye cat.

The vacuum has emerged. So has my legend.

VengeancePairs with cat-fleeing meme.

I am very small but my agenda is enormous.

KittenPairs with kitten-staring-up.

I have one (1) brain cell. It is currently chasing my tail.

KittenPairs with kitten-tail-chase.

Crying because the world is loud and I am six weeks old.

KittenPairs with kitten-mid-meow.

Tried to jump on the bed. The bed won.

KittenPairs with kitten-falling.

This shoebox is now my country. I have flags.

KittenPairs with cat-in-box.